Have you noticed that there are many times when we don’t want to do something, but we want to want to do it? That sure is true for me. Paul says it in Galatians:

… and more clearly in Romans chapter 7, in each of these verses:

There are times we don’t want to do something, even though we know it’s the right thing to do – but we know we should want to do it.

We don’t do it because we don’t want to do it. But we wish we wanted to do it.

Similarly, each of the ‘works of the flesh’ as Paul calls them (as opposed to the fruits of the Spirit) has this characteristic: we want to do those for which we have a weakness, but we don’t want to want to. How many times have we caught ourselves in a rage about something, for instance, only to realize that (a) it felt so good and (b) it was so wrong? ¹

I think we’re designed that way, and I think it was done for a very specific reason. Over and over again, I find that God limits Himself and us. He could have made us perfect, but for our benefit He didn’t.

So where does all this leave us? Are we helpless pawns to our desires and weaknesses? I don’t think so – for these reasons:

1. As Christians, we are children of Almighty God. Good Dads don’t leave their children defenseless. We are tempted, and it seems that the temptation is permitted in order to produce endurance:
   No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.– 1 Cor 10:13
2. We are called to ACT, not to REACT. When we act, the things we do and the thoughts we think originate new sequences of events. He who starts something controls it first – the other side must work within the scope of the original action. The enemy longs to reverse that, in order to keep us off balance. But if we get into the habit of ‘checking in’ with the Father before everything we do, then everything we do becomes an initial action, and it is as if every prior wrong step is redeemed thereby. Bad steps are stopped. Poor choices are corrected. Good decisions are strengthened. And best of all, that habit will spill over into the rest of our lives. Thus every thought will be checked out first with God as well – held hostage to the Lord:
   We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ, …– 2 Cor 10:5

As the leading proponent of Galatians 5:19-21 thinking, I can attest to the fact that – on the rare occasion when I remember to – when I tell God that I want to think these thoughts but I don’t want to want to, I find it’s easier to shift my mind onto some more healthy topic. Similarly when I don’t want to apologize to someone who deserves an apology, etc..

Life isn’t easy, but then – it was never intended to be.

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I’m perfect.

Oops – that was pride slipping in there. Maybe I’m not quite perfect.

In which case, I’ve also just told a lie. (Gack!)

Oh, like you’ve never fibbed before. (Uh-oh, that wasn’t a very nice thing to say. I’m getting in deep here.)

OK, I’m not perfect. There. I’ve admitted it. (Phew! That wasn’t too hard.)

So I can’t be all that bad. (Arggh! Pride again! It just snuck up on me!)

If I had been made perfect, I’m wondering what the implications would be…

1. Being perfect, I would never sin – never hurt anybody, always do the right thing.
2. Therefore being perfect, I would have no personal understanding of what sin is.
3. Therefore being perfect, I would never have a sense of wrong-doing.
4. Therefore being perfect, I would never be aware of my separation from God.
5. Therefore being perfect, I would never understand the power of sin.
6. Therefore being perfect, I may experience sympathy, but would never experience empathy; and any compassion would be academic and patronizing.
7. Being made perfect would have removed my free will, because I would be able to do nothing but perfect things.
8. Therefore being perfect, I would never have the chance to fail. I would never have the opportunity to succeed despite myself.
9. Therefore being perfect, I would never be stretched. I would never grow.
10. Therefore (also from #8) being perfect, when God told me to do something and I did it, there would be no just reward because there was no chance I’d do the job badly or fail to do it at all.
11. Therefore being perfect, I would never experience humiliation, shame or contrition; but I would also never experience forgiveness, rebirth, reward, praise and grace.
12. Being perfect, God’s righteous perfection wouldn’t astound me, terrify me or shatter my complacency because – hey lookee! Me too!
13. In fact, being perfect, I would be self-contained, so I would have no reason to reach for God.

On the other hand:

1. Since I’m not perfect, eternal damnation is not my guaranteed end.
2. Since I’m not perfect, Perfection took compassion on me.
3. Since I’m not perfect, Perfection chose to redeem me.
4. Since I’m not perfect, Perfection perfected me.
5. Since I’m not perfect, Perfection adopted me.
6. Since I’m not perfect, Perfection uses me (yes – Because, not Despite).
7. Since I am far, far from perfection, I have a great many chances to blow it completely… Ah, but when I get it right the angels go nuts and God Himself says, “Well done!”

And that last is really where I’m headed here. Amongst other reasons, I was made imperfect in order that God could give me a piece of His action – a task that He wanted completed. And each time I fulfill a task in obedience to His design, I – Mr. Imperfect – get the pat on the back from the Everlasting King of Glory.

And that, I think, is a pretty good trade-off.

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I’ve been thinking about churches recently – reading a lot about church leadership, following some of the great leaders’ blogs and twitters, thinking about how churches start and about how they come to an end. I suppose there are some that shut down by being called to do so, just as they started up. But I can’t think of any offhand, and most die a long, painful, lingering death.

There are so many reasons for a church’s death – occasionally, people in a rural setting simply aren’t there anymore when the whole town shuts down; in an urban setting, sometimes the neighborhood becomes commercial or industrial and houses are pulled down and replaced with a mall or a factory. But mostly, I suspect, the church simply fails to listen, obey and fulfill its mission – to go into the world and make disciples. When it doesn’t do that, it lets Christ down; He pulls the plug.

A couple of days ago, I was thinking about the parable of the talents ¹. We always think of it being applied to individuals, but I started wondering if it could be applied to a church. Do churches fit into this pattern? I think so.

Here’s the précis: Some fit the 1-talent mold: they’re holding a great gift, but they’re clueless about what to do with it. They don’t want to risk losing what they have, so they bury the chance for success. Some fit the 2-talent mold: they take the risk and they find expansion happens, even though their situation isn’t ideal – they used what they were given to great effect. Then there are some that are 5-talent churches: they’re in an ideal position – they have the geography and the population, the leadership is just right and they act on it. They experience tremendous growth – in evangelism, in discipleship, in missions, in spiritual vitality.

Let me flesh that out after the Scripture:

There are churches that have been ‘doing church’ for so long it has become a habit, rather than a mission. New people aren’t searched for, or even delighted in when they arrive – they’re tolerated, and that only if they stay inside the boundaries that the church currently maintains. But the most terrifying thing of all is change. For these institutions, any change at all is anathema – someone in the congregation will object: “It’s not the way we do things here!” – so if change is suggested by anyone foolish enough to risk it, the suggestion is quickly squashed. Things that annoy people may cause them to leave, and 1-talent churches are too small and frail to be able to afford someone leaving. However, people must leave in the end, and as the oldest of the congregation are carried out, the congregation dwindles slowly into dust…and their talent is taken from them – they buried it, quite literally, in their coffins.

Then there are the 2-talent churches that really ‘get’ their mission, but may be positioned away from the big population centers and so don’t get the huge numbers of people that the mega-churches do. But they get to work anyway, and they apply creativity to their situation where they are; they embrace change as not just inevitable but also useful. They listen to the Word and the Spirit; they do some things with future growth in mind; they steal ideas and look at how ‘big’ churches model innovation – and they connect to the culture around themselves and in so doing reach others…and their 2 talents become 4.

Finally there are the 5-talent churches. Mega-churches have gotten a bad rap these days, but I have to wonder how much of this is fueled by jealousy or belief that it happened by some sleight-of-hand. Ministry shouldn’t be a competition; it should be a partnership. This is a race we’re all in, not as competitors but as a relay team. God forbid we should decide that other churches are ‘the enemy’ – hasn’t Satan won then? Isn’t that exactly what he wants? Get us to fighting against each other and we won’t have time to bring people to Christ.

The 5-talent church has the highest strengths, but also the greatest responsibilities. So many of these churches are in high-population areas, and for them, the following holds true:

• Big business thrives in the big cities; big business seeks out and draws in high-performers and makes them live in proximity.
• High performers (Christian or not) want to excel – at maximizing income, fame, influence or anything else they see as their target. So they move to the cities.
• Some high-performers are great leaders; all great leaders are high-performers. The city holds many great leaders.
• Some great leaders are Christians, go to church, and become involved in their church’s missions.
• A church, like every other endeavor, grows fastest under great leadership.
• A church can only grow when it reaches out.
• Churches can grow fastest and largest where there is the highest population to reach out to – in the cities.
• Cities hold the densest population of broken people – some on the streets, some going there, some lost in other ways.
• Christ seeks to heal, to comfort, to meet needs and to draw others to Himself.
• Christ uses the church to do this.
• The Spirit will guide the obedient church into developing ministries to fulfill Christ’s desire.
• Big lostness requires a big response, which in turn requires big resources. The Spirit (an infinite resource Himself!) can marshal those resources through organizations willing to obey sacrificially.

Christ has always put a premium on healing the lost and broken – unfortunately His church has often felt they were a nuisance. 2-talent churches – and 5-talent churches even more – must and do put themselves in the role of the Samaritan rather than the priest or the Levite².

The only real difference in our parable between the servant who got 2 talents and the one that was given 5 talents is that their master favored the latter – presumably because he recognized higher potential – there was something greater that the 5-talent servant was capable of. The only difference between a 2-talent church and a 5-talent church is that the 5-talent church has similarly been granted access to greater resources – planted in a city, perhaps, rather than a rural area. There is no difference in the effort each put in – both doubled the original talents entrusted to them.

And the reward for each was identical. The master said, “Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.”

We may not be called to be a 5-talent church – but that better not stop us from being a 2-talent church. When the Master in question is God, entering into His joy is beyond understanding!

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I was watching the pre-show about THE NINES the other day, and watching the viewer counter. At one point it rose to 310 simultaneous viewers. Not bad as an indicator of an event that only began to be publicized 6 weeks earlier! Here’s some other info:

• The schedule assumes 9 hours of transmission – there’s 8.62 hours of raw footage already. I must say I’m a little surprised, since there are some 75 speakers, and who ever heard of anybody that ever got up into a pulpit to speak for less than the allotted time! My guess would have been for 75*9/60 = 11.25 hours – but they’ve got the files.
• Some 7,000 people have signed up to watch. And if I’m any indication, that only includes the signer-uppers, not all the additional people who are going to show up by invitation to watch.
• There will be some live cut-ins at the top and bottom of each hour – sounds like the Catalyst conference is going to do some advertising then.
• There is no schedule for the day yet – they may push one out during the day. This is a bit disappointing – while I want to find new people to listen to, I’d also like to know when people I’ve heard of (but never actually heard) will be on.
• It will be pushed at streaming quality (500 Kbps), not at satellite quality for most people.
• Recordings will be posted after the conference.

I’ll probably be blogging the conference here at Praise Christian Fellowship in CT – let me know in the comments if you’d like to join us.

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1

Tempted recently? Yeah, me too. Doesn’t matter what we’re tempted about – stealing, gossiping, lust, cheating on a test, cheating on your taxes, cheating on your spouse – it always seems to start the same way, doesn’t it? ‘Go ahead,’ this voice says. ‘Everybody does it. You’re a schmuck for holding back. What’s the harm? You’re not hurting anybody. It’s just a little thing really – so ordinary. It’s easy – nobody will know. Who’s going to find out? You deserve it. They deserve it.’

I mean, there’s a list of these encouragements … you know them by heart … they apply to everybody … and THEY DON’T EVER CHANGE. Ever. You could add a couple more that I’ve left off, but it’s a standing list.

So why do we have such a hard time with them? Why haven’t we figured out how to get past them and move on? Why haven’t they become so old that they are as hackneyed in reality as they sound on paper?

Why haven’t we gotten to the point where we just say, ‘Shut up!’ to the little voice that says them all the time?

A good salesman works hard at selling his product. He creates a desire in the customer – he sells the ‘sizzle’ – in order to get to the end result, the commit. He invests hard in the first to bring off the second. And make no mistake about it: the Tempter is a very, very good salesman.

Society has moved from a rigid ‘Thou-shalt-not’ set of values to a permissive one, and while I think that we prefer (for the most part) to not be living in the Victorian Age, I also think it’s true that we tend to be very easy on ourselves. Good at forgiving ourselves any little indiscretion. Skillful at justifying ourselves.

2

So we do it. Whatever ‘it’ was. But, this was a one-two whammy – a sucker-punch. We were set up. All the time he was saying that litany of things, and moving us to the ‘sale’, he was anticipating the payoff. Commit the sin, the crime, the indiscretion and then it’s no more ‘yeah, go on – do it’. Now you hear him scream – ‘Look what you did!!!! You’re in for it now! Don’t you feel rotten? How could you have <insert sin here> like that?’ Oh, the glee in that voice. He stands before the throne of God and points the finger at … you. His primary role as the Accuser is in full play now. You are condemned by your own actions – what could be more wonderful to him?

3

Well, there is one thing more wonderful: Thing is, it’s not just a one-two. There’s a three as well. And the saddest part of all is that we do the third part to ourselves (talk about being set up!). Because – especially if this is the second or third or ‘nth’ time we’ve done this – if it’s a habit, for instance – we say to ourselves, ‘I can’t believe I’ve done that again! What a worm! I can’t bring this to God – I’ve already done that and asked for forgiveness – I know I don’t deserve to be forgiven again. And anyway, I’m too ashamed to bring it in front of Him – to admit it – to confess it – to ask again for forgiveness.’

And this is the Accuser’s coup de grace – the cherry on the top. He didn’t work the sizzle for this – just the accusing bit would have been enough – this is a freebie that we hand him: We deny full and free access to God to ourself. This is neither God’s doing, nor that of the Father of Lies – it’s all us!

Here’s what one small book near the back of the Bible has to say about forgiveness:

Here are some essential facts that we must keep in mind when we reach this point:

1. God is big. Very, very, very big. Infinite. Don’t put Him in that box you’ve built for Him, ‘cause there’s no way He’ll fit. If you could put the entire universe into the box – you still couldn’t fit God in.
2. God hates sin. Very, very, very much. Yes He does – no denying it. We’d be dead if the message stopped here, but we can only fully live if we understand this. You see: until you ‘get’ that He hates sin, you’ll never ‘get’ what His love cost Him – so you’ll never ‘get’ the fullness of His love.
3. Standing in front of God, we are a Nothing. A small, infinitesimal zero. Less than a dust bunny by comparison. Slave to our own ego.
4. So here we are: nobodies – slaves in the worst meaning of the word (the way Paul used the word – bound by the habits and chains of our own perversions) – and sinners, standing guilty in front of an infinitely good God who hates sin.
5. Gulp.
6. And yet God loves us. Very, very, very much. Infinite love from an infinite Being. Love that works out a way to get dust-bunnies washed clean of their own filth. A love that does insane things – like sending His only Son to be killed by a bunch of slaves so that those very slaves themselves might not just live, but be adopted . Now let’s be honest – that’s insane.

So what does all this mean? God understands the bit about temptation; He understands about sin; He even understands about repeated, devastating, perverted, habitual sin. He’s seen it all. He’s seen you do it.

And He still loves you more than you love yourself. Like I said – insane.

4

In the face of all this love blazing down from Heaven … we need to understand this little point:

For as long as we decide that our sin is too big for God to forgive;

for as long as we decide that God is too small to forgive our sin;

for as long as we are so sublimely arrogant as to believe that we make the choice about coming or not coming to God –

we will stay disconnected from God; sin will be our master, and we will remain blind.

And the Accuser will win a much more permanent prize.

The point is not all the sin.

The point isn’t that we should stop sinning (we can’t).

The point isn’t even that we should at least try to stop sinning (we should).

The point is that there is something far better than sin that we can spend our time – our lives – thinking about.

The Glory of His Grace is so overwhelming, and His love is so all-consuming that when we think about it in its proper perspective we have no time for petty things like self-esteem, self-worth or worry about sin.

Listen: you are eternal; you are immortal; you should reflect His transcendent beauty; you are a prince or princess, the child of Almighty God … and you’re wasting your time thinking about sin?

Get over it. You’re far, far, far too valuable to be focused on that junk.

Get in front of God and unload that guilt. While I’m certainly not encouraging more sin (shades of Romans 6:1!), I will point out the mathematically obvious – that the person who commits a thousand sins in a thousand days and confesses each one immediately is a far cleaner and more useful person to God than the one who commits one sin and can’t confess it for a thousand days.

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Not for the first time, I was struck by this passage as I read it the other morning. It’s like a smushed-down version of the essence of the Gospel – Paul’s packed all the vital bits in. Lookit – as Christians:

Now that’s worth meditating on for a week or two!

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